Do you watch Dancing With The Stars? I think it's the best reality show on television, in part because I like to watch dancing, in part because it doesn't really have a mean bone in its body and in part because I've never seen The Amazing Race, which everybody says is the best reality show on television.
Anyway, last week was the first week of this new season and, at the same time, the last week that we have to put up with Hope Solo. Who, despite her lengthy Olympic resume, can't dance a lick. No rhythm, for starters, but more critically no willingness to let go, loosen up. Plus a complete unwillingness to take coaching. Which is odd, because I would think that running the hurdles would be all about rhythm and being loose and listening to the coaches.
What's that song from Flashdance? Something about feeling the rhythm?
It's called What a Feeling.
No question mark?
Anyway, nobody has time for the big black cloud that was Ms. Solo. Who on the show admitted she's both a virgin -- this is public news, and that's absolutely fine -- and that she's not slow-danced with a man since her high school prom because, apparently, everybody made fun of her because she was a crappy dancer.
So she's thinking to fix all this [Editorial note: Based on my limited experience with Ms. Solo, Sigmund Freud couldn't fix all this] in front of 20 million people? And she thinks it's going to go well? Because it didn't. And, thankfully, they tossed her off. It's like on the Dog Whisperer where Cesar's pack shuns the psycho-dogs.
Next up, her domestic violence trial. How very much of the moment! She's alleged to have assaulted both her sister and her teen-age nephew, if I've got it right. The good news? US Women's Soccer just made her the captain of the international team.
I read that last sentence and wrestle with it. I'm all about due process. And I certainly feel like we are too quick to toss it aside and mount our Societal Horse of Righteous Indignation to demand that people lose their jobs (although I think they should fire Roger Goodell when he gets back to the office on Monday). So part of me thinks she should play until she's had her day in court. Another part of me thinks they shouldn't have made her captain.
And it also bugs me when people scream that Ray Rice should never play football again. Let the man pay his penalty, genuinely try to rehabilitate himself -- easier said than done, but it's the journey that matters -- and then get back to his livelihood.
Hell, Michael Vick is one of the absolute stand-up guys in the league right now and they threw him in the slammer for two years. Good for him.
I'm taking the Jets against the Bears.