Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Do you know who I don't trust?

Do you know who I don't trust?

I mean, besides Jeff Koons, of course?

I don't trust people who think the best thing about the Super Bowl is the advertising. I mean really. Wake up. There was a time when the ads in the Super Bowl were memorable. The throw-the-hammer Mac ads for one. And some others, like those Bud frogs. See here for more. But now? Please. Wake up.

Here's a question for you. Do you remember when people used to go gaga over the Sports Illustrated swim suit issue? The idea of the SISSI (how's that for an acronym?) is for men to get their rocks off looking at beautiful women in bathing suits. But really, in this day and age, you can go on the internet and look, for free (I'm assuming), at beautiful women who've taken their bathing suits off. Isn't this a better way to achieve the stated objective? So why then does the SISSI remain one of magazine publishing's most talked about events, despite the fact that the magazine itself is one big stupid bore?

Public relations.

Now let me ask you this: who do you think places all those stories about Super Bowl ads in the newspapers and on television shows? All those polls about which was the best one?

Public relations agencies. And their clients? Organizations like the Ad Council. An organization that wants you to watch the ads.

You do the math, sucker.

Me? I tivo'd the SB, didn't start watching until about 8:00 pm, fast forwarded through the commercials completely. Likewise all the crap that passes for sports analysis and commentary. Watched the Prince halftime show twice. Did you see those dancers? When I caught up to real-time somewhere around the beginning of the 4th quarter I paused the playback, went into another room and read one of those Spenser for Hire detective novels. One of the tricks for the Spenser novels is that the chapters are really short. I read maybe three, then went in and was able to enjoy the rest of the game without having to watch a single commercial.

Actually that's not true. I did, by accident (sometimes you misjudge the speed with which the fast forward function is working and push play too soon), see the now-controversial Snickers commercial and found it moderately offensive, not very amusing.

Have you noticed how Andy Warhol is everywhere this year?

I don't trust him either. I mean, look at him. At least he's dead.


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