Monday, January 12, 2009

The anger, the anger...Volume 2

Behold "Waitress #5 (torso)" ...

Anger isn't the right word for how I feel about this painting. But it's one of those steps you go through on your way to the acceptance of dying.

They are: denial, anger, depression, negotiation and acceptance. This, I believe, though granted pop cultural significance from the scene from the movie within the movie titled "All That Jazz," actually comes from a scholarly paper by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.

Because isn't every bad painting a little bit of dying? On my part, at least? The winnowing of Geoff? The life-force as a zero-sum equation? Whatever the hell that means.

Me? I've thought about the relationship between the Kubler-Ross thesis and a bad painting--more particularly an obscured box painting--and where it goes off the tracks is with the negotiation. Because, unlike regular paintings, OBs are immune to negotiation. That is to say, more or less, once you peel off the paper, you can't really fix them. They just are what they are. So despite my best efforts, the lower left corner is simply that: the lower left corner. I've messed with the hand enough and am now done.

And I'm past anger. I'm just depressed. And the good news is that, since we've ruled out the negotiation phase, soon enough I'll just accept the thing for what it is.

"Waitress #5 (torso)." Nothing more and nothing less.

Tomorrow I begin "Waitress #5 (reclined)."


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