Saturday, October 19, 2013

The Porsche Conundrum

If you are a Porsche guy you are familiar with what I'm about to tell you.  That being that Porsches -- 911s in particular (even though they're not called 911s anymore; they really are) -- are extremely fast cars that like nothing better than a curvy stretch of road.  That said, they all (with perhaps the exception of the most recent models) share a handling quirk.  That being that if you find yourself deep in a curve and are thinking you're going perhaps too fast (as if any responsible person in a high performance sports car would find themselves in such a fix), the last thing you want to do is take your foot off the gas.

I repeat:  You are going too fast through the corner, but whatever you do, don't take your foot off the gas.

If you do, take a moment to look out the side window.  You'll see your rear end sliding past you.  The massive crunch you'll hear next is the car's arrival, rear-end first, in the ditch or the guardrail or the cow pasture (Cow pastures don't make such a crunching sound.  More of a squish).

What do you do instead?  Give it a bit more gas, turn into the skid, and with a little luck the car will find its own way through the mess; your incompetence notwithstanding.  The way it's sometimes better to just let your horse figure out how to negotiate some tricky trail.

All that sounds a bit easier said than done.
That's why it's a conundrum.

This reminds me a little bit of drinking at the Peter McManus Cafe.  You say to yourself, OMG I'm drinking too much too fast.  I've found myself in this very predicament and I can promise you,  the very next thing you should do is order a shot of whiskey.  Do not, I repeat, do not take your foot off the gas.


Blogger John Harbour said...

I have been in that state at PMMC and did take my foot off of the gas. And I can attest, you will see your ass pass by you. Usually on the left.

1:45 PM  

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