Food alright, little Alex?

How about that Rick Perry ...

Indicted by a grand jury on two felony counts of abuse of power yesterday.  Of course he's innocent until proven guilty, but c'mon, you know he did it.  Whatever it was.  Or at least I'm choosing to think that he did it.  Or them, since it's two counts.  After all, speaking as a muckraker, him being innocent is way less interesting than him being guilty.  So really, it's a matter of editorial convenience.

You know, this whole thing could have been avoided if we'd just elected the man president.

What's wrong with you people?