Sunday, September 14, 2014

If I don't blow my own horn, who will?

You may remember this line from the post titled Weed In The Workplace ...

There are so many things in the world that are fucked up.  My job, as I see it, is to help fix them by mentioning them on The Year of Magical Painting.  It is in this way that I make the world a better place.

And this bit of business from I Gather All The News I Need On The Weather Reports ...

Me?  I gather all the news I need on ESPN.  Which, let me tell you, is a slippery slope.  Nonetheless, Exhibit A ...

This, my friends, is a scary dude.  Turn that black paint into white and he's Uruk-hai.  Which, as noted moments earlier, is some scary shit.  Buttressing my point, his nickname is The Kraken, which actually sounds kind of Orc-y.

It's Greg Hardy of the Carolina Panthers.  What makes him newsworthy is that he's been convicted of assaulting his pregnant fiancee.  And threatening to kill her.  Convicted.  I'm all good with the innocent until proven guilty business, but this guy's been proven guilty.  Just because you're appealing a case doesn't mean you are considered not-guilty anymore.  Just the opposite, in fact.

Yet Carolina's suiting the guy up because, hey, quality defensive ends don't grow on trees.

I thought the Uruk-hai reference was pretty strong.  But that's not the point.  The point is that the news out of Panther headquarters is that Mr. Hardy won't be suiting up this week.  You, my dear friends, the Magical Painting Nation, have spoken!  Plus some other people, I'm guessing.

For that I am both proud and humbled.

Proud, certainly.

Update:  This from the Department of Corrections -- which sounds like jail but Here at the Year, we being euphemism-free, is merely the Department of Corrections.  I don't think Greg Hardy's fiancee is pregnant.  That is some other NFL guy currently awaiting trial.


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